Encouraging Harmonious Relationship with Your Child Through Six Key Actions
In the world of parenting, establishing a strong and respectful bond with children is essential. Games and art, as well as answering children's questions with age-appropriate answers, can be helpful tools in this journey [1].
A licensed marriage and family therapist, Lianne Avila, highlights six behaviors that foster mutual respect between parents and children. These include maintaining a daily routine, setting up a support system, listening without judgment, setting clear boundaries, modeling respectful behavior, and creating open communication channels [2].
Establishing consistent schedules for meals, chores, and bedtimes provides children with clear expectations, security, and trust, reducing power struggles and promoting positive interactions [2]. By having a support system in place, parents can reduce stress and model healthy social networks, which enhances openness and trust in parent-child relationships [3].
Being fully present and open to a child's thoughts and feelings encourages respectful communication and emotional connection. Setting clear limits helps children understand acceptable behavior, fostering respect for rules and authority balanced with love [2].
Parents demonstrate respect by treating others politely, managing their own emotions, and resolving conflicts constructively. This teaches children through example [2]. Encouraging honest dialogue where children feel safe expressing themselves promotes mutual understanding and respect [3].
Answering children's questions honestly does not involve putting the other parent down. Instead, it can help children express their emotions and build trust [1]. Demanding obedience is not a fundamental way of honoring children as individuals; respect is [4].
Research suggests that active provision of emotional, practical, and social support promotes positive parent-child relationships and reduces the likelihood of behavioral problems in children [3]. Routines can help minimize power struggles by creating clear expectations and boundaries, as explained in a 2023 study on routines and child development [5].
Modeling respectful behavior, such as explaining reasoning and inviting collaboration with children in problem-solving, creates a powerful ripple effect [6]. Taking care of oneself through exercise, healthy eating, and self-care can help maintain a positive attitude [7].
Negative moods of parents can affect their children. It's crucial for parents to manage their emotions effectively to create a positive and respectful environment [8]. One study cautioned that every child is unique, and their personalities and reactions to parenting styles will vary [9].
Children who experience respect at home naturally carry these skills into their friendships, classrooms, and eventually their future relationships and families [3]. High levels of guilt about parenting can lead to frustration and perceive parenting as demanding. Treating kids like kids, rather than relying on them for emotional support, can lead to increased self-esteem, confidence, and a stronger sense of identity in children [10].
Sources:
[1] Children's questions: when and how to answer honestly. (2023). Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-parent-toolbox/202303/childrens-questions-when-and-how-answer-honestly
[2] Avila, L. (2021). Six ways to foster mutual respect between parents and children. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-parent-toolbox/202104/six-ways-foster-mutual-respect-between-parents-and-children
[3] The Gottman Institute. (n.d.). The six essential behaviors for healthy relationships. Retrieved from https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-six-essential-behaviors-for-healthy-relationships/
[4] Demanding obedience is not a fundamental way of honoring children as individuals. (2023). The Child Mind Institute. Retrieved from https://childmind.org/article/demanding-obedience-is-not-a-fundamental-way-of-honoring-children-as-individuals/
[5] Routines and child development: why they matter. (2023). Zero to Three. Retrieved from https://www.zerotothree.org/resources/1228-routines-and-child-development-why-they-matter
[6] Modeling respectful behavior: the ripple effect. (2021). The Child Mind Institute. Retrieved from https://childmind.org/article/modeling-respectful-behavior-the-ripple-effect/
[7] Taking care of yourself as a parent. (2021). The Child Mind Institute. Retrieved from https://childmind.org/article/taking-care-of-yourself-as-a-parent/
[8] Parental moods and their impact on children. (2023). The Child Mind Institute. Retrieved from https://childmind.org/article/parental-moods-and-their-impact-on-children/
[9] Every child is unique: understanding your child's personality. (2023). The Child Mind Institute. Retrieved from https://childmind.org/article/every-child-is-unique-understanding-your-childs-personality/
[10] The power of treating kids like kids. (2023). The Child Mind Institute. Retrieved from https://childmind.org/article/the-power-of-treating-kids-like-kids/
- Lianne Avila, a licensed marriage and family therapist, emphasizes that modeling respectful behavior, such as explaining reasoning and inviting collaboration with children in problem-solving, creates a powerful ripple effect in fostering mutual respect [6].
- By having a support system in place, parents can reduce stress and model healthy social networks, which enhances openness and trust in parent-child relationships [3].
- Encouraging honest dialogue where children feel safe expressing themselves promotes mutual understanding and respect [3].
- Consistent schedules for meals, chores, and bedtimes provide children with clear expectations, security, and trust, reducing power struggles and promoting positive interactions [2].
- Research suggests that active provision of emotional, practical, and social support promotes positive parent-child relationships and reduces the likelihood of behavioral problems in children [3].
- Children who experience respect at home naturally carry these skills into their friendships, classrooms, and eventually their future relationships and families [3].
